The Great and Mighty Fck Up
by grave-walker
Summary: Arthur/Merlin oneshot genderswap and Crack fic. In which there is a sorceror who f*cks up, and Merlin is turned into a girl. A girl Arthur can't help but notice, that is quite smexy


The Great and Mighty F*ck Up

So there's this sorcerer. He entered the kingdom about a month ago, or so his victims say. And has been a royal pain in the royal ass of Uther Pendragon, who as a result became a royal pain in the royal ass of Arthur who became the royal pain of the not so royal ass of Merlin. His name was The Great and Powerful Charlie, I shit you not. That is what the man called himself. The great and powerful Charlie is his name, his name is the great and powerful Charlie. Charlie, in Merlin's opinion, is a great and powerful jerk. As was the opinion of the entire kingdom. For Charlie thought himself very funny. His sorcery involved such acts as turning the butcher into a pig, the horse breaker into a pony, master being turned into his servant, and the servant being turned into the master and the list goes on.

The man was a simpleton. He wasn't exactly helping the negative image of spell casters in the kingdom. Merlin decided this was one sorcerer he wouldn't mind Arthur arresting and placing before his father. Speaking of the devil, of course when Uther heard the word 'sorcerer' spoken in complaint by his people he began his long rant at Arthur that started with 'You must' and finished with 'Off with the enchanters head' or thereabout. Stupid magic racist kings that can't do anything for their damn selves. So yes it started with Charlie. Which resulted in a witch hunt and a short battle between sword and sorcery. Merlin tried to stay out of it, since half the knights in Camelot were hopelessly fighting the mentally challenged sorcerer. But as usual Merlin had to go and do the stupid thing and jump in front of a glowy light aimed for Arthur after Charlie shouted:

"Arthur Crown Prince of Camelot

So proud is he,

From this point ever on,

Never King shall he be"

Apparently he fancied himself a bard as well. A coward however, he was proven when Arthur turned to face him but found the sorcerer had vanished.

Arthur rode back to Camelot with an unconscious Merlin in his arms. He burst into Gaius's chambers and placed him on the table.

'What happened?' Gaius asked and began to examine the invalid.

'He was hit by some form of magic, I don't know what it was, he shouted something about me never being king and then Merlin interceded...,' Arthur described.

'He has a fever,' Gaius commented and fetched a pale of water.

'Will he be alright?' Arthur asked.

'If I get his fever under control, he should be fine by morning,' Gaius set Arthur at ease.

'Alright, then I should go report to my father,' Arthur nodded 'Take care of him Gaius,'

'Of course sire.'

Gaius stayed by Merlin's side all night, however instead of responding to Gaius's methods Merlin got steadily worse. His fever worsened and he was shaking. Gaius tried to stay awake to monitor him throughout the night but old age caught up with the physician. Slowly Gaius became aware of sound and light that did not reason within the jumbled images of his dream. He roused and rubbed his face, forcing himself to come to full wakeness. Then upon remembering Merlin's condition, a surge of panic raced through him as he realised he had fallen asleep. Gaius bent forward to check on Merlin's condition and froze. He pulled back Merlin's blankets and examined him.

'Oh dear.'

'Gaius' Uther greeted as the old man entered the hall where the royal family (plus Morgana) were having breakfast.

'How's Merlin?' Morgana asked concerned.

'Well the spell appears to be more serious than I first thought,' Gaius announced.

'What do you mean?' Arthur asked 'Is he alright?'

'Well yes, physically he's completely healthy. He's awake and has...quite an abundance of energy,' Gaius rubbed a bruise forming on his forehead.

'Well than, what's wrong with him?' Arthur asked.

'Well...,'

'I'm a bloody GIRL!' Merlin exclaimed is not so soft but feminine tones.

He could almost cry with frustration. He'd been through the entire spell book twice and every spell he tried had failed, even his innate magic was gone. Apparently when his penis goes so does his magic;. How freaking sexist was that!

'Merlin, please let me in,' came a voice on the other side.

'Go away Gwen,' Merlin whined and then groaned at his very girly voice.

'I just want to help you,' Gwen pointed out.

'Gwen, I'm a girl, how could you possibly help me?' Merlin asked.

'Well, for starters, I could give you something to eat?' Gwen suggested.

Merlin pouted, but the thought of food made his mouth water.

'Very well then, I'm coming out....as long as you swear not to laugh,' Merlin negotiated.

'I swear to you,' Gwen promised. Merlin sighed and opened the door, stepping out into outside world.

Gwen gasped and her hand flew straight to her mouth.

Merlin was...well ...beautiful! Her hair was long jet black and fell in soft curls. Her eyes...well they were the same gorgeous blue as before but with those lashes it made them so alluring and captivating. Merlins' skin was the same pale as ever, but on Merlin as a girl it seemed like porcelain; and the baggy clothes Merlin had worn to bed did nothing to hide the full breasts and slight hips.

'I'm a freak!' Merlin cried and fell on Gaius's bed, burying her head beneath many sheets.

'You're beautiful!' Gwen exclaimed.

Merlin froze for a moment, before a head popped up to look at her.

'Really?' Merlin asked genuinely interested.

'Yes! God Merlin you make Morgana look plain!' Gwen confessed.

'No, there's no way,' Merlin shook his head but ran for the mirror.

Merlin stood before his reflection for a long pause '...wow.'

'I know right?' Gwen hurried over to him and ran her hands through Merlin's curls 'I would kill for your hair.'

'Easy now, I think I've been through enough today,' Merlin smiled and they both laughed.

Then the door opened and Gaius entered the room.

'Well, how did it go?' Gwen asked.

'Arthur has left to find the sorcerer,' Gaius explained 'Uther has granted Merlin the day off, but is expecting him to fulfil his duties as servant when Arthur returns.'

'They expect me to work?' Merlin gaped 'After I've been cursed?'

'Well the spell doesn't exactly effect you in a way were you are unable to fulfil your duties does it?' Gaius pointed out.

'Great,' Merlin groaned 'Arthur's going to have a jolly time making fun of me for this one.'

'Merlin?' The door opened and Morgana walked in. Her eyes went to the she/man and widened comically as her mouth fell a little.

'Hi Morgana,' Merlin greeted and rosy blush appeared on his cheeks.

'Oh Merlin!' Gwen placed a hand over her heart 'You're even more pretty when you blush!'

Morgana hurried over to Merlin and began to examine him more closely.

'You look like some fair maiden from a tale!' Morgana was practically squeeing with excitement 'I almost didn't believe it when Gaius told me. '

'How did...' Merlin broke off 'how did the King and Arthur respond? They didn't laugh at me did they?'

'Ah...well ...,' Morgana thought 'Uther didn't seem at all concerned...but I'm afraid Arthur wasn't nearly as refined.'

'He nearly doubled over when he heard...' Gaius recounted 'For a moment I was afraid he might pass out.'

'Great,' Merlin groaned and buried her face in her hands.

'He was so jealous, he wanted to come see it for himself but Uther demanded he leave immediately,' Morgana continued 'I'm sorry Merlin,'

'I don't suppose there's anything you could do to reverse this?' Morgana asked Gaius.

'No, I'm afraid not,' Gaius looked over at Merlin silently asking him the same question.

Merlin shook his head.

'Well then I'm afraid the only way I know of to cure Merlin is to get the enchanter to undo the spell or kill the man himself.' Gaius explained.

'Do you think Arthur will be able to do it?' Gwen asked Morgana.

'If he can find him,' Merlin sighed 'Oh god I am NOT looking forward to serving Arthur tonight.'

'Oh I'm very much looking forward to it,' Morgana grinned.

'You're sadist aren't you?' Merlin glared.

'It's quite simple Merlin, to get Arthur to shut up, you just need to make him speechless, trust me, this I am a master of,' Morgana stated proudly.

'And how do we do that exactly?' Merlin asked doubtful.

'Hmmm...Yes the green one I think, that should do the trick,' Morgana thought aloud.

'Oh my gosh!' Gwen exclaimed catching on to Morgana's idea 'what about the pink or the soft blue?'

'Well they're all so lovely...I think we'll just have to try them all,' Morgana beamed in excitement.

'I suddenly shuddered for no reason,' Merlin spoke aloud.

'Now Merlin, we go to my chambers,' Morgana grabbed her arm and made her stand.

'Yes, you can't go around dressed like a boy,' Gwen spoke up 'It'd be such a waste.'

'What? No! I am a boy, I like boy clothes.' Merlin spoke panicked suddenly realising where this was going .

'Not any more you're not, and Uther won't allow you to walk around dressed like that...it's not proper, all the men will stare at you,' Morgana argued.

'T-they will?' if it was possible for Merlin to go any paler he would have.

'Oh yes,' Gwen nodded.

'W-well I guess I could wear a dress, but something simple, no gowns!' Merlin argued.

'Well where's the fun in that?' Morgana asked him 'I have an entire 3 chests full of clothes that would look so lovely on you'.

'No, no gowns. I couldn't wear your clothes anyway, I may no longer be a boy but I'm still a servant!' Merlin pointed out.

'Oh dear,' Morgana sighed.

'We could always go fetch him something beautiful from the market?' Gwen suggested.

'Brilliant!'

'Well shit,' Merlin cursed.

And so it was for the rest of the day Merlin was a living breathing doll for Morgana and Gwen. He- I mean she, must have tried on at least thirty dresses before they finally decided on a white dress. As soon as Merlin had put it on the girls had gasped and shouted

'That one!'

'It makes him look like some kind of moon goddess,' Gwen whispered to Morgana as Merlin was changing behind the curtain.

'I'm sort of jealous,' Morgana giggled.

'God Merlin what is taking you so long?!' Gwen asked.

'Ah, nothing I'm just getting changed back into my old clothes,' Merlin confessed.

'What?!' the girls shouted and pulled back the curtain.

Merlin gave out a mini shriek, as he was currently very naked.

'Oh that is soo not fair,' Gwen sighed.

'You're not just a woman Merlin, you're the _perfect_ woman. My god, look at those breasts!' Morgana remarked.

'Please close the curtain!' Merlin begged.

'Oh no, we've got to get you ready for tonight,' Morgana grinned 'Why'd you take off the dress?'

'Ah because there's still two hours before the feast?' Arthur pointed out.

'Exactly, we'll barely have enough time to get you ready, then I have to prepare as well,' Morgana went through her schedule in her head.

'We're going to be late,' Gwen had already figured it out 'But not by much.'

'Perfect, I love to make an entrance,' Morgana grinned.

Three hours later and Merlin had a new found respect for women. The amount of work it took to look like a lady...it wasn't easy. You had to be really bloody patient. Merlin would never complain about how long Arthur took in the mirror ever again. The three girls stood outside the hall ready to enter.

'I'll go first,' Morgana told them 'we'll make up a good excuse as to why you're late, and let them know you're coming. Sorry Merlin but I don't like to share attention and you're a little bit much for me to handle tonight.'

'That's completely fine with me , really, in fact if you want I can just go back to my quarters?' Merlin asked hopefully.

'Don't you dare, or I'll dress you up in ball gowns for the rest of the week,' Morgana threatened.

Merlin groaned and Morgana entered the hall.

'Well, well, finally decide to grace us with your presence I see,' Arthur spoke up from the table.

'Where have you been?' Uther asked.

'Womanly duties, my apologies,' she spoke and sat down and began to fill her plate 'So Arthur, how'd the search go today?'

'Horrible, not one sign of him, it's like he just disappeared into thin air,' Arthur grumbled 'speaking of which where's Merlin? I thought he was suppose to be here tonight?'

'He is,' Uther nodded.

'Sorry Arthur, that's my fault. It only just occurred to me that Merlin only possesses men's clothes. And it is definitely inappropriate for a woman to be walking around in breaches, and a tunic. So I had to get him fitted for something decent to wear. He'll be here shortly with Gwen,' Morgana explained.

'I'm not so eager to see that,' Percival joked 'She'd probably be the most hideous thing to lay eyes on.'

'Or the most amusing, seeing how to fit broad shoulders into a wee dress, or a gaping space where the bosoms should fill,' Kay added 'And lord help us if there's panty hose.'

Arthur and his knights laughed at the image conjured in their minds, of Merlin cross dressing as a lady.

As if perfectly timed the doors opened and Gwen and Merlin walked into the room. A silence fell upon them. Merlin's dress left nothing to the imagination, it revealed a hint of breasts and cupped the swell of his hips. Long black locks fell freely and perfectly around his face and down his back.

Merlin bowed awkwardly, definitely NOT curtseying.

'I'm sorry sire, I can attend to my duties now if you wish?' she asked Arthur.

Arthur nodded mutely, mouth hanging open and eyes devouring. The flush once again spread across Merlins' cheeks and the girls smirked at the handy work. Mission to make Arthur speechless, well and truly accomplished.

As soon as Arthur was alone with Merlin in his chambers he turned on her.

'Say something!' he begged.

'W-what?' Merlin asked shocked.

'Anything...it's just...I can't believe it's you,' Arthur stammered.

'Believe me neither can I,' Merlin grumbled and began to clear the mess on Arthur's table.

'What the hell is this?' Merlin asked and gestured toward the untouched cake on the table.

'That, is disgusting,' Arthur clarified.

'The hell it is, that's the cake Sarah made for you in the kitchens. The one she slaved over, when you lied and told the staff you didn't feel well so they'd give you whatever treats you so liked!' Merlin glared.

'I am the prince, I'm allowed to eat whatever I want to eat,' Arthur pointed out.

'She's older than some of the stones of Camelot; it took her an age to make that cake, now you'll bloody well eat it!' Merlin declared.

'Are you telling me what to do?' Arthur asked.

'No! Just, I won't take this down to her with none of it eaten,' Merlin argued 'It'll break her heart.'

'But it's gross,' Arthur argued.

'So's your face you don't see me complaining,' Merlin snapped.

'My face is NOT gross,' Arthur scoffed. Merlin went over and grabbed a hunk of the cake in his hand.

'It is, just everyone's too nice to say anything about it,' Merlin lied and stalked over to Arthur.

'I'll have you know that lady Aisling told me just yesterday that she thought my face was reminiscent of roman sculptures,' Arthur stated.

'I think she was referring to the one with the body of a man and the face of a bull,' Merlin remarked.

'Prince Arthur of Camelot does not have a face like a-,' in that moment Merlin dove in and shoved the hunk of cake in Arthur's mouth, before clamming his hand over said mouth to make sure Arthur didn't spit it out. Arthur protested and tried to pull back, but Merlin followed him, so that when Arthur fell back into a chair, Merlin climbed on top of him to make sure Arthur's mouth stayed shut until he swallowed it down.

When he did, Merlin pulled his hand back.

'See now, was that so bad?' Merlin asked.

'I take it back, it most definitely is you, no woman would be so bold as to sit on my lap,' Arthur remarked.

The rosy blush spread across Merlin's cheeks as he realised would he had done.

A huge grin spread across Arthur's face.

'Did you always blush like that?' Arthur asked him.

'I don't know sire,' Merlin got up and went to continue about his chores.

'I'll tell you what Merlin; I'll eat the cake, upon one condition,' a smirk formed on Arthur's face 'that you feed it to me.'

'Augh! I knew this would happen. You're never going to let me live this down are you?' Merlin groaned.

'Sure I will, when it's a cold day in hell and my father's having a sleigh ride with the great and powerful Charlie.'

Weeks passed and still Arthur and his knights had no luck in finding Charlie. Merlin was getting use to the long looks, the whispers. Although one thing he could do without was Sir bloody Kay. The way he looked at Merlin just creeped him the hell out, he'd also grabbed Merlin a few times. A grasp of his ass as Merlin was walking by, but always when Merlin's hands were full, and unable to do a damn thing about it. So Merlin stalked away fuming, with a promise to curse Kay when he got his powers back.

With being a girl however, Merlin had a few revelations. For instance, the feeling he caught when the other knights, Kay or *shudder* even Uther looking at him, made him feel horrible, and wish he was as ugly as the knights first believed he would be. Or even diseased, so he knew they wouldn't dare touch him. However, there were times Merlin thought, though he wasn't entirely sure, he saw Arthur looking at him. Those pale blue eyes under a sandy fringe, looking over at him across a room. The feeling caused a warmth in Merlin's belly, it made Merlin do strange things, like brush his hair back away from his neck, so more skin would show, or look up at Arthur under his lashes like some maiden. It was ridiculous. And it needed to stop. So he went on as before, treating Arthur exactly the same as he always did. Which wasn't at all hard. Until it was. Let the record show, that the entire thing was _Arthur's _fault.

You see, Arthur began to touch him. No not like that, you filthy people with your minds in the gutters. Innocent touches, but enough to bother Merlin...just not in the way he suspected. When Arthur would come up to Merlin to talk to him he'd rest his hand on Merlin's arm, or elbow or shoulder. Perfectly innocent. Or sometimes when they were talking a hair would fall over Merlin's face and Arthur would brush it aside. Or sometimes Merlin would trip and Arthur would catch him around the waste. Or sometimes when Arthur was holding his goblet and Merlin was filling it (one hand pouring, one hand balancing the cup with Arthur); Arthur would stretch out a finger, just one, so that it was barely touching Merlins. It was driving Merlin insane. Every single bloody time, Merlin would blush. He would get hot all over, and be unable to look his master in the eye.

So as it came about because of Stupid Charlie and his stupid great power, Merlin realised he had a huge gay crush on the crown prince of Camelot. Merlin cannot express how much he hates that stupid magician.

However Arthur's behaviour made Merlin more than a little suspicious. Which is why he found himself going to see Morgana one afternoon, despite the risk of being turned into a giant doll once again.

'Merlin!' Morgana smiled as he entered and Gwen immediately came over, ignoring her duties for the moment.

'I have a question to ask you,' Merlin stated.

'Yes?' Morgana raised an eyebrow.

'Is Arthur a very good seducer?!' Merlin blurted, before realising how very bad that sounded 'Not that I'm saying he ever seduced you...it's just does he have a reputation? Or were there cases in the past, where he seduced, I don't know, some young crushing innocent girl?'

'...you're serious?' Morgana realised and a sly grin spread across her face 'Why Merlin, why would you want to know?'

'Ah...no reason....just curious,' Merlin lied.

'Oh I'm sure,' Morgana grinned 'Well if you must know, Arthur's a virgin.'

Well, Merlin wasn't expecting _that. _

'...you're serious?' Merlin echoed Morgana's earlier words.

'Oh yes, he swore to Uther, that he would never bed a woman save in a marriage bed,' Morgana clarified 'To avoid any bastard heirs trying to claim the throne.'

'Ohh okay...you're sure though?' Merlin asked.

'Merlin this is Camelot, if Arthur was bedding lasses, everyone would know it. Gossip is truly amazing here, I swear introduce a person with a secret into the population and I'll bet you within five days the entire keep knows about it,' Morgana continued.

Except for a certain someone, who use to be a boy, who therefore used to have a penis, which therefore granted Merlin all his power. Stupid sexist magical powers that be.

So this new information means several things.

Arthur's innocent touches really _were_ innocent touches.

Merlin's freaking lucky to have gotten this far with his secret intact

Arthur must be the horniest prince on the planet, not to say Merlin isn't just as horny with the no sex. But Arthur's _Arthur_, he practically screams shag, shag, shag. Yes three shags, one for incredibly fast release, one for experimentation, and one for lazy early morning sex. Not that Merlins' thought about this before...ever.

Arthur made Merlins heart sore when he came back one evening to tell Merlin yes, they had found Charlie. Only then to be followed by, he turned Sir Perival's sword into a fish and then vanished...again. Merlin was about to sink into a fit of self pity when Arthur reached to comfort him and winced.

'What is it?' Merlin asked worried.

'It's nothing, just a cut, Gaius has already had a look at it, it'll be fine,' Arthur protested.

Merlin boldly pulled back the fold of Arthur's tunic to find a very deep gash just below the collarbone , with stitches sewn in to keep it together.

'A cut!' Merlin gasped 'you've been sewn up for pity's sake.'

'Take off your shirt,' Merlin told him.

'What?' Arthur asked, flushing a little.

'Please, I want to have a look,' Merlin asked nicely and Arthur shucked off his shirt and tossed it aside. Merlin walked up closer to Arthur and ran his delicate fingertips over the wound.

'This is my fault,' Merlin sighed.

'It is?' Arthur asked 'So you're Charlie in disguise as a servant boy, in disguise as a recently cursed servant girl?'

'You know what I mean, if I hadn't gotten cursed...'

'You mean, when you jumped in front of a spell that was going to hit me?' Arthur clarified.

Merlin looked up at Arthur and lost all track of what she was going to say. Arthur was so close, and looking at her...oh god the way he was looking at her. That warm feeling of want burned once more, and like a flash flood, spread throughout her entire body.

'Arthur,' Merlin breathed out.

At the sound of his name Arthur moved even closer still.

'Merlin...now would be a good time for you to go out that door, right now,' Arthur warned.

'And what if I don't?' Merlin asked.

'Then I don't know if...I won't be able to stop myself from touching you,' Arthur whispered.

Merlin didn't move. Arthur's hands came up to rest on Merlin's hip, and the heat increased. Arthur groaned.

'Last chance,' Arthur warned.

'Arthur,' Merlin whispered 'all I want is your hands on me.'

Finally Arthur's lips pressed against Merlin's and it was wonderful. Arthur's tongue slid into Merlin's mouth and a hot pulse burned in the place between Merlin's legs. Arthur kissed Merlin until she was dizzy, arms clutching at each other. Arthur slid the dress from Merlins' shoulders and it fell to the ground exposing Merlin's beautiful milky soft breasts. Arthur licked his way down Merlins' throat, making her toss her head back, exposing more skin to Arthur's mouth. Arthur cupped Merlins' breasts in his hand and rubbed the nipples with his thumbs making Merlin gasp and her eyelids flutter. Arthur's hands ran all over her, making them both more desperate and much more vocal. Arthur slipped off Merlin's undergarments, leaving her completely bare.

'You're so beautiful,' Arthur whispered and traced his hands down to cup her ass, pulling her up against him. Merlin went willingly and plunged her tongue deep into Arthur's mouth, making him moan and rut against her a little. Before scooping her up and laying her out on his bed.

Except Arthur didn't go back to the kissing and the touching, he just lay on his side and looked Merlin up and down. Merlin blushed and reached up a hand to bury in Arthur's hair. Arthur placed his hand on Merlin's flat stomach, before moving his touch down slowly to the mound between Merlin's legs. Merlin gasped and spread her legs immediately. God it felt sooo good. Merlin was burning all over, clutching at the sheets, bitting her bottom lip and letting little noises escape in gasps and soft moans. Arthur rubbed his thumb over the clit continuously driving Merlin closer and closer to the edge. Then Arthur was between his legs and his tongue was running up and down, and inside of her and Merlin was crying out and feeling the greatest release she had ever known.

Merlin collapsed back against the sheets panting, but barely had time to think before Arthur's hands were back on her, spreading her legs wider, and pressing fingers up inside her. Merlin's head rolled back, and more pleasure rolled through her, oh god, it was good Merlin could barely stand it. Then Arthur was up above her and pulling her close and she felt the head of Arthur's cock press right _there._

'Is this okay?' Arthur asked 'Please Merlin, say its okay.'

Merlin rolled her hips and the head slipped inside. Arthur groaned in absolute bliss, before pressing forward and sheathing himself inside her.

Then they began to move together. It was perfect beyond words. They were panting and sweating. Clutching at each other, desperately moving hips to get that little bit deeper, that little bit harder. It was so good and they were both so close. Merlin was chanting Arthur's name over and over. Before Merlin lost it, Arthur was squeezed as Merlin rode out her second orgasm. And Arthur came hard inside of her. They both fell back against the sheets, exhausted and tangled up together.

The sun shone through the gap in Arthur's curtains and brought Merlin back to the present. She was lying across Arthur's muscular chest, legs entangled together. Merlin sat up and looked down at her lover. So peaceful. You'd never guess he was a complete prat. Merlin stood up and wrapped the sheet around her so she could clear up the things she had left last night, get dressed, go to her room and dress in clothing that she hadn't worn all day yesterday.

'What are you doing?' a husky voice sounded from the bed.

'My job,' Merlin looked over at him and smiled sweetly.

'To hell with your job, come back to bed.'

'Sure you say that now, but you're going to want you breakfast soon, and for me to fetch your clothes,' Merlin stated and brushed back her curls from her face.

Arthur stood up and walked over to her, bare ass naked, which despite everything made her blush and look away.

A grin spread across Arthur's face and he cupped her cheek in his palm.

'I love it when you blush,' he confessed 'It makes me want to...,'

'Yes?' Merlin asked cheekily.

'Well sometimes, it makes me want to pull you into my arms and kiss you, and other times it makes me want to make that blush spread across you entire body,' Arthur confessed.

'Arthur,' Merlin sighed and they both leant forward and pressed their lips together.

Arthur's tongue slipped inside her mouth, tasting her desperately. Merlin wrapped her arms around his neck and the sheet dropped the floor. Naked body was pressed up on naked body when the door opened.

'Arthur you simply must talk to Uther he's being-,' Morgana started and broke off when she saw them.

Needless to say Merlin's blush returned.

'Oh so _this _is what you were talking about yesterday,' Morgana smirked.

'What?' Arthur asked, as Merlin dropped down and reclaimed the sheet. Arthur grabbed a side corner to cover his manhood. Since Morgana seemed on insisting to stay there.

'Merlin asked me if you were in the habit of seducing young women,' Morgana clarified.

Arthur turned to Merlin and raised an eyebrow.

Merlin blushed .

'Well what was I suppose to think, with all the coy glances and touching, you were driving me crazy. And I wasn't going to bed you simply because I was female and you're the prince and had a hankering for my new....femaleness,' Merlin began to speak quickly 'then she told me the limit of your experience so I...made my own decisions. Which as you can see lead to this moment here...hi Morgana.'

'Good Morning Merlin, well I'd best leave you two to it,' she waved and closed the door.

'Hmm, well this won't do,' Arthur mumbled.

'What?' Merlin asked nervously.

'I can't have you thinking my experience is soo limited. Well practise makes perfect.'

'Ah! Arthur put me down! Ow Arthur that's a tender area and I am not a two year old nor in need of punishing! Ow!'

So naturally, the entire castle knew that Merlin and Arthur were bumping uglies. But somehow Merlin couldn't find it in herself to care. Every night she found herself in Arthur's bed. And all day the glances and touches and knowing smiles continued. Merlin didn't think she'd ever been this happy. And she could touch Arthur now too, no more watching from afar wishing or daydreaming. She got to do what many ladies dreamed of, letting her hands run over his muscle, having him manhandle her like she was nothing. Yet they still teased each other. Merlin didn't think that would ever end. It would always be a part of who they were together. Most of the unwanted starring stopped as well. As though he had a sign around his neck that read "Property of Prince Arthur, Hands OFF!". Sir Kay however didn't seem to have gotten that message. His looks and crude gestures still freaked Merlin out. But she was too content with Arthur to care.

Then as per usual in Merlins life, everything went to shit. Apparently our dear mate Charlie tried to turn an ironess, into the tool of her trade, only screwed up the rhyme. It seems that magic is next to useless against a hungry lioness, who knew.

So that's how Merlin collapsed in the dining hall one day, to be waking up back in his quarters with Gaius, all boy parts and powers fully restored. It's also when he realised that although he was overjoyed to have his penis back (and magic of course). It also meant that he was no longer a girl...which would mean that Arthur...

When Merlin revealed himself to the court, they had already been informed of Charlie's demise and suspected that Merlin would have returned to normal and completely ignored his presence. So yeah, back to normal then; Except for the part where Arthur absolutely refused to meet his eyes. Arthur also refused to talk to him, he spoke only to give orders and would leave the room or cut him off whenever Merlin tried to talk to him. The message was clear, Arthur wanted nothing to do with Merlin anymore. Merlin was capable enough to clean up after him and prepare his meals but not to warm his bed.

Merlin could hardly stand it, every time he got a glimpse of blonde hair and blue eyes it felt as though someone were squeezing his heart; but he would not beg, as it so happens Merlin did have some scraping of pride left. He stopped trying to talk to Arthur and went about his own work. A part of Merlin was furious at Arthur, another part wished that he was still a girl so he could go back to when Arthur would smile at him and pull him close, whisper in his ear and kiss him ever so desperately. Merlin dearly missed the freedom of being able to touch Arthur, even just as before as comrades or even slightly the faintest of friends.

So it was, due to Charlie and his royal fuck up, Merlin came to realise he was more than a little smitten with his prince, the words 'all a quiver with love' do _not_ come to mind, but describe the situation quite well. Merlin would rather eat Kay's socks than say the words aloud however.

The normalcy continued, ever more so when a creature was reported attacking one of the outlying villages. Arthur and his knights, accompanied by a handful of servants (Merlin included) rode out to vanquish it. The day of the battle Merlin had to adorn Arthur in his armour, it was the closest they stood to each other since they were lovers. Merlin kept his mind on his task. The familiarity of touching Arthur however, made Merlin ache. Upon finishing Merlin, sighed and looked up at Arthur. Merlin froze where he stood. Arthur's eyes were boring into his. Arthur seemed to lean forward for a moment, before he stepped back, grabbed his helmet and stalked off without a word.

The town held a great celebration in the keep, for the brave knights that had slew the creature. There was dancing, feasting, girls, and lots and lots of ale. Merlin couldn't find it in his heart to celebrate and left the hall. He walked down an empty corridor toward the rooms they were to sleep in when someone grabbed Merlin from behind and shoved him hard against the wall.

Merlin's head cracked against the wall making him cry out in pain. A hand slapped across his mouth to silence him.

'If you want to live beyond the night you will remain silent!' a voice hissed. Merlin recognised it immediately as Sir Kay and began to panic.

'Your prince may no longer want you in his bed, but i can think of nothing else,' Kay growled and tore open Merlin's shirt before shoving his hand down Merlin's breeches grasping and pulling on his soft cock.

Merlin struggled but his mind was still foggy with pain and overwhelming fear. Kay grabbed Merlin, turned him around and slammed him back into the wall. Merlin's breeches were pulled down to his knees and Merlin's legs were forced a part. Merlin hadn't felt this vulnerable since he was a woman, but a few things were different now, Merlin recalled and felt his fingers burn as he called on his magic. He was about to mutter the incantation as he felt Kay position himself but then suddenly he felt Kay being violently yanked away from him. Merlin turned to find Arthur sword drawn with a look on his face that frightened Merlin so much more than Kay ever did. Kay was clutching at his arm, blood seeping through his fingers.

'Kill me, and face my father,' Kay hissed at Arthur.

Merlin didn't know who Kay's father was but it must have been someone incredibly important because Kay was still breathing.

'Leave now,' Arthur growled 'Touch him again and I swear on my mother's grave I _will_ have your head.'

Kay stood and stalked past Arthur back toward the celebrations. Merlin pulled up his breaches and tugged his torn tunic to cover his chest.

'Are you alright?' Arthur asked and reached out to put his hand on Merlin's shoulder. Merlin pulled back before Arthur could touch him.

'No, no I'm not alright Arthur,' Merlin replied 'Who the hell said you could save me?!'

'I-...what?' Arthur asked confused.

'I had the situation well in hand,' Merlin argued.

'Merlin...I saw him...he had his cock out and was...,' Arthur was shaking in frustration.

'I don't care!' Merlin shouted 'You can't just toss me away like garbage and then come to my rescue in some dark hour. It's a little more than mixed messages.'

'I couldn't just let him have you!' Arthur shouted back.

'Why not?' Merlin asked 'Since you obviously don't care anymore. If you don't want me then that doesn't mean to say that no one else would like to.'

'Well from where I was standing it didn't look consensual,' Arthur growled.

'It wasn't,' Merlin went on.

'So you'd rather Sir Kay take you than for me to save you?' Arthur asked incredibly confused.

'Yes!' Merlin exclaimed.

'Why the hell not?' Arthur yelled.

'Because he could never hurt me more than you have!' Merlin shouted, before realising he said one word waaay too many. Either way Arthur was quite stunned to silence.

'I-I'm sorry, I didn't know you cared that much,' Arthur spoke and that was like a knife to Merlin's heart.

'Yeah well I do,' Merlin spoke softly 'Despite how completely without feeling you are, some of us are human.'

'I think I love you,' Arthur suddenly blurted.

'...w-what?' Merlin asked rather gobsmacked.

'I think I'm in love with you,' Arthur repeated.

'...well you sure as hell don't act like it!' Merlin exclaimed.

'I'm sorry, it's just...I thought that once you were turned back, things would go back to normal. We'd go on as we did before. But I couldn't stop myself from thinking about you. All the time. How beautiful you are, those eyes, those ridiculous ears, that blush that makes me weak in the knees,' Arthur went on 'It made our time together a little...awkward.'

'I thought you just wanted to toss me aside, that you had your fun with me and now had no use for me,' Merlin gaped.

'God no, are you that daft to think that I think so little of you? Merlin...even before the spell...I adored you. You're the only one that talks to me like...well like you do. Then the spell was cast and I couldn't help but notice how beautiful you are, and then you were turned back and I further realised that you had always been this beautiful and I just never noticed it because...well because I can be a little slow sometimes,' Arthur explained.

'...you do realise that I'm not a girl?' Merlin clarified 'I have a penis.'

'Yes, and don't think I haven't thought about that as well,' Arthur spoke huskily and walked toward Merlin.

'You've thought about my penis?' Merlin asked.

'Oh yes,' Arthur confessed I've thought about stroking it, swiping my thumb across the tip and making you fall a part, I've thought about running my tongue all over your cock and tasting your arousal, I've thought about sucking you dry and having you chant my name again. You scream so sweetly Merlin.'

Merlin was blushing quite profusely which made Arthur groan and cup Merlin through his pants. Merlin whimpered and his arms wrapped around Arthur like a reflex. Arthur began to rub him and Merlin was squirming, and pushing up against Arthur's hand for more.

'I've thought about having this cock inside me, and I've thought about mine being inside you. Because Merlin, I _love_ being inside you. Always so hot, so tight, you always seem to desperate to have me there as well, and to keep me inside you,' Arthur went on.

'Feels so good,' Merlin confessed, Arthur removed his hand and pulled down his and Merlin's breeches to reveal hard arousal. Arthur leant forward and began to thrust their aching erections against one another. Merlin cried out and arched toward Arthur, seeking more friction. Arthur pressed hard against Merlin and began to thrust in steady rhythm. Pre come was leaking, slicking them both up as they moved against each other, fast and hard, too worked up to slow down both skyrocketing toward release.

'Fuck, missed you so much,' Merlin confessed as his toes curled.

'Mnngh, you too, no idea,' Arthur replied, before all ability for speech was lost.

Merlin began his usual chanting of Arthur's name and Arthur buried his head in Merlin's neck as they both shot off, back's arching, heads thrown back and coming hard all over each other.

They leant back against the wall panting and exhausted. Before finally sharing a long and tender kiss.

'So...you love me?' Merlin broke away to clarify.

'...yes...despite better judgement,' Arthur answered and grinned cheekily.

'You...are a prat.'

'but you can't help but love me,' Arthur continued.

'And so what if I do?' Merlin asked defensively as Arthur pulled him close, buried his head in Merlin's shoulder and breathed in Merlin's scent 'It's all Charlie's fault anyway.'


End file.
